Brotherless

Today I took our friends three kids after school because they are moving. My kids get along really well with these particular kids, even though they are all girls Jacob generally seems pretty happy - he has a lot in common with their middle daughter.

They had an afternoon snack and went outside to play.

I went upstairs to change a load of laundry and happened to glance out of the window. All the girls were jumping on the trampoline but Jacob was wandering barefoot in the backyard. He had his favorite sash from the dress-up box tied around his waist (it's his "holster") and a wooden rifle in one hand and a big plastic sword in the other. I stopped and watched him for a moment. He climbed onto the rocks around our back flower beds and swung first the rifle and then the sword in circles. He looked off into the woods, then climbed down. I could hear the girls still squealing and laughing on the tramp as he ambled around the backyard by himself again.

My heart broke for him just a little bit, this son of mine surrounded by girls. I have always thought that 2 girls and 2 boys would make the perfect family - everyone gets a brother, everyone gets a sister. When I had two girls and a boy and was expecting Jane, I really thought she would be the brother for him. After she was born our family felt finished, even though she was another girl. Rick works really long hours and we are far from family help. My hands were full with a teenager and two babies - and trying to give sweet Emy sandwiched in the middle - some of my time too. There was no guarantee that another baby would be a boy ....  we decided our family was complete.

Truthfully, Jacob and Jane are great buddies and have been such great friends for each other, but as he's got older the gender difference has played out a little more. All he wants to do is play "guys" and Beyblades. One Saturday recently he told me he was bored. "Why don't you play with the girls?" I said. "They're playing play-dough." He gave me a withering look. Encouragingly I said "Maybe you could make a fort out of it." Exasperated he replied "Mom, I already played American Girl dolls with them and I know they're going to make cupcakes!!"

I guess it's why I am willing to let him be a bit over-scheduled. At least each afternoon is spent playing sports and often on a team with other boys. He's running off energy and enjoying time with other guys. I think it's good for him and he seems happy to be there.

I think having all these sisters will eventually help him be a better husband and a more tender father. At the very least I think he'll understand women more.

In the mean time, I'll keep him busy and try to have lots of play dates.

 

'Cause man, I love this little dude and all his boyishness - with every last bit of my heart.